Dear Ask a Man,
I’ve met a lot of creeps and not enough keeps in my short 28 years. Recently, I met a potential keep and we expedited our “situationship” by hooking up. Surprisingly, he was still interested in developing a relationship and we continued to communicate every day for the next week. I decided to share with Mr. Potential Keep that things have moved so fast and I was thoroughly enjoying myself, however I was still hesitant because things seem too easy and my past has taught me to raise an eyebrow at easy and fast. He was thoroughly offended and bluntly stated that if he was still calling after our hook-up; then I shouldn’t question anything and he went on to complain that I defamed his character. Was I wrong for my thought process? And was I wrong for sharing my reservations with someone I felt so comfortable with? What do you two think?
Dear Ms. Quickie,
Well, for starters your Mr. Potential is nothing more than a jumpoff upgrade. You “expedited” the actual process of getting to know this guy. You in all probability refer to him as your “friend” which in reality is the best way to tell others that you have a “cut” buddy with whom you are trying to establish a friendship and a relationship, which means that you have attempted to negotiate the terms of your relationship with your vagina. You can’t meet a man and in the space of two to eight weeks, let alone three months know him well enough to consider him a “friend” or even refer to him as such. It takes no less than a year for the representative to play him/herself out and the real person to reveal him/herself.
The fact that you were surprised that he still wanted to deal with you after the session tells me that you were unsure of the outcome from the beginning, which takes me back to you not even knowing buddy well enough to be sexing him in the first place. You had sex with a stranger that was incredibly personable and because the sex was good to you see no reason to not have an emotional relationship which is in effect based on how good he made you feel. How you move when it comes to establishing relationships with men is backwards. No house built on a foundation made of sand with twigs for walls & a straw roof will ever be able to withstand the test of time or the bad weather!
The fact that you shared how you were feeling is/ was not the problem here, the problem is/was the fact that YOU know this “situationship” was moving too fast because YOU were moving too fast. Your eyebrows raised because YOU realized that YOU were/ are easy to fuck & quick to suck. So by telling him this you attempted to gauge his reaction / thought process on the possibility of how frequently you make your holes available to men without feeling like a whore / freak with a loose vagina. That’s that reverse psychology women hit men with to avoid shame and humiliation. Both of your eyebrows should now have a permanent arch because you are “easy & fast” & I don’t know which one is greater.
No man will value or respect you anymore than you value and respect yourself! Using your vagina to negotiate and set the tone of your relationship with men is futile.
What you are enjoying is the feeling of NEWNESS that the sex brings with each new person. Eight or nine months from now you’ll probably realize or wish that you NEVER sexed him in the first place.
Easy Cum Easy Go!